'losing my religion' - the view of scøüpe
as a child, it is easy to believe. in truth, you want to believe and you have no real reason not to do so. of course, children have troubles and hardships and every child has his personal things which he must endure. but as a child, one doesn't question his beliefs at these trials so much as he clings to them. a death of someone close causes him to believe more in heaven because he's been taught that it exists and, as of yet, has no reason to question this theory. he wants to believe something good has happened.
as the child grows older, however, he experiences more and more hardships and calamities; he becomes more aware of the world around him. more aware of his own small world and the entirety of mankind. war and cops-and-robbers are no longer games but a cruel reality. cowboys-and-indians is no longer a backyard gunfight but the reality of the effect manifest destiny had the original inhabitants of two entire continents.
the child-like innocence of ignorance is gone, replaced by the true horrors of everyday life. the teenage years become a time of rebellion to authority and doing things in one's own way. breaking the lawbrings a thrill and rush of personal power. this same rebellion flows into the teenager's beliefs. things he was once forbidden now seem appealing and without danger. curiosity eats at him and he demands to know why these things are kept from him. he questions the very morals on which he was raised as he begins to realise that other have different and even contrary standards. this new knowledgedrives him to ponder his beliefs in whole and wonderif he has merely been duped by another childhood belief. the deity and doctrines which he was raised to follow and believe in - even shape his life around - begin to have the appearance of santa claus, the tooth fairy and the easter bunny. allwere ploys to keep children behaving as their parents wished.
thus, the child's rebellion slowly increases while he waits for something to prove him wrong, for his conscience to stand up and announce where the boundaries lie. he finds new pleasures and philosophies and wonders why his old morals were against something that feels so good and brings such pleasure and enlightenment to life.
he will still remember his old beliefs and will seek truth at some point, often returning to the institution which taught him these beliefs. this may be family, church, synagogue, temple or even school. but as he returns to re-evaluate his beliefs and his desires, he sees what he could not as a child.
hypocrisy is prevalent. the ideas taught as doctrine have no sacred writings to support them but are merely the opinions of those in control. priests molest young boys; pastors embezzle money or have affairs with other women; religious leaders have bastard children; national leaders have sexual scandals; sports players are tried and sometimes sent to prison; politicians accept bribes and focus on their opponents' mistakes rather than the issues. each and every leader, idol icon or hero for a child or teenager to look to as a mentor or influence in life is a fake, criminal or hypocrite. the teenager wants to be like none of these and therefore seeks to forge his own path, hoping he will not become that into which those before him have turned.
and in the end, we have the generations of the judges wherein "each man did as was right in his own eyes". unable to trust another's view of life, this child-turned-teenager-turned-adult lives according to his own conscience,following his own thoughts and opinion, using only his instinct and gut feeling as a guide through life in search of that which is true. will he become a healthy adult? that is still to be seen.
but this we know, no religion began with a book or bible of koran or any other sacred writings or teachings. each has begun in the heart of man. if truth were able to speak once to man's heart and show him the right way - however flawed that way and its followers may have become - she can do so again in the hearts and lives of individuals and in the heart of an entire people.
do not fear when a man wanders and seeks for what is right on his own for truth is not hiding; she longs to be found by all. any who truly seek truth shall find her and by this she will soread to all men.
these generations are not lost but have lost their faith. disillusionment is the best thing which could happen to a man with displaced faith. only when the illusions are removed and the façades seen through can a man truly begin to seek that which is true.
as the child grows older, however, he experiences more and more hardships and calamities; he becomes more aware of the world around him. more aware of his own small world and the entirety of mankind. war and cops-and-robbers are no longer games but a cruel reality. cowboys-and-indians is no longer a backyard gunfight but the reality of the effect manifest destiny had the original inhabitants of two entire continents.
the child-like innocence of ignorance is gone, replaced by the true horrors of everyday life. the teenage years become a time of rebellion to authority and doing things in one's own way. breaking the lawbrings a thrill and rush of personal power. this same rebellion flows into the teenager's beliefs. things he was once forbidden now seem appealing and without danger. curiosity eats at him and he demands to know why these things are kept from him. he questions the very morals on which he was raised as he begins to realise that other have different and even contrary standards. this new knowledgedrives him to ponder his beliefs in whole and wonderif he has merely been duped by another childhood belief. the deity and doctrines which he was raised to follow and believe in - even shape his life around - begin to have the appearance of santa claus, the tooth fairy and the easter bunny. allwere ploys to keep children behaving as their parents wished.
thus, the child's rebellion slowly increases while he waits for something to prove him wrong, for his conscience to stand up and announce where the boundaries lie. he finds new pleasures and philosophies and wonders why his old morals were against something that feels so good and brings such pleasure and enlightenment to life.
he will still remember his old beliefs and will seek truth at some point, often returning to the institution which taught him these beliefs. this may be family, church, synagogue, temple or even school. but as he returns to re-evaluate his beliefs and his desires, he sees what he could not as a child.
hypocrisy is prevalent. the ideas taught as doctrine have no sacred writings to support them but are merely the opinions of those in control. priests molest young boys; pastors embezzle money or have affairs with other women; religious leaders have bastard children; national leaders have sexual scandals; sports players are tried and sometimes sent to prison; politicians accept bribes and focus on their opponents' mistakes rather than the issues. each and every leader, idol icon or hero for a child or teenager to look to as a mentor or influence in life is a fake, criminal or hypocrite. the teenager wants to be like none of these and therefore seeks to forge his own path, hoping he will not become that into which those before him have turned.
and in the end, we have the generations of the judges wherein "each man did as was right in his own eyes". unable to trust another's view of life, this child-turned-teenager-turned-adult lives according to his own conscience,following his own thoughts and opinion, using only his instinct and gut feeling as a guide through life in search of that which is true. will he become a healthy adult? that is still to be seen.
but this we know, no religion began with a book or bible of koran or any other sacred writings or teachings. each has begun in the heart of man. if truth were able to speak once to man's heart and show him the right way - however flawed that way and its followers may have become - she can do so again in the hearts and lives of individuals and in the heart of an entire people.
do not fear when a man wanders and seeks for what is right on his own for truth is not hiding; she longs to be found by all. any who truly seek truth shall find her and by this she will soread to all men.
these generations are not lost but have lost their faith. disillusionment is the best thing which could happen to a man with displaced faith. only when the illusions are removed and the façades seen through can a man truly begin to seek that which is true.
posted by scøüpe at 11:55 PM
8 Comments:
The truth of humanity lies in the seeking of an infinte answer to a question that we cannot begin to conceive of asking. (Scully said something similar once, but that was about dreams: "Dreams are the answers the question we haven't yet learned to ask")
Part of our humanity is the desire to seek truth, original and complete, but our finite conceptions of our reality (which are flawed anyway, due to the very nature of individual human perception) are almost completely meaningless as guides towards the realization of said truth.
Is "truth" some kind of manifestation of perfection beyond this world? Is it something that we aspire to become, to transform into? Or is it outside of our "selves," something into which we become immersed?
Either way, I can't tell if your post is a criticism of the tarnished term "religion," or a justification of it as humanity's attempt to dig deep towards an answer. In your mind, is "religion" separate from the previously mentioned "belief?"
Maybe I'm not fully "getting" your post in the way that you want - maybe I'm talking myself into circles (eJnan and Darren know I'm good at that). But I think I know what you mean.
But I can always stand to be corrected.
yesterday Abbey asked me why pool water's always cold. it took me @ 10 minutes of conversation to distill my knowledge of the subject down into something she could grasp. one day, she will sea it all fully; today, she still seas only in part. though she doesn't fully understand the answer i gave her, she trusts that i told her the truth. this is so, b/c i've refused to ever lie to her. the tooth fairy, santa, the easter bunny are all games to her, more than anything else, b/c she knows they're not real. she knows, b/c i told her so. i told her so, because when she asks me if GOD is real, i need for her to be able to believe my answer.
as adults, we tend to give ourselves a little too much intellectual credit. no matter how learned, aged, or wise we get, we are still like children when we seek answers to the deep questions. our minds cannot comprehend the answer to a question we think to be so simple, we are embarrassed at having had to ask at all.
when abbey asks me a queston for which there is no answer suitable for an 8-yr-old, i simply tell her, "because my ways are higher than your ways, & my thoughts than your thoughts." and she believes me. she usually sighs heavily & mutters, "Oy." but, annoyed as she may be, she believes me.
i think maybe my main point could be summed up by tolkien: "not all who wander are lost". not everyone out of the traditional church body is a heathen reprobate. some are simply searching to find God on their own terms -- not to define God to fit their needs but to come to understand him as they are able.
paul writes, "that which may be known of God is manifest in them; for God hath showed it unto them. For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse..."*
all the evidence to find God is out there and has been there since the dawn of time. let men search, for Christ said, "ask, and it shall be given you; seek and ye shall find; knock and it shall be opened unto you. for every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened"**
*romans 1:19,20
**matthew 7:7,8 (sorry about the kjv, it's the easiest for me to find things in.)
remember when i 1st moved here, & we'd drive around 'til we got lost, so that we could figure out where the hell we were? it was always that last turn that did it. i'd remember how to get back where we started, up 'til that one last turn, then i'd suddenly be lost.
i guess my point is, it's just so easy to wander farther than you ought to, before you realize you're lost.
I like those last couple lines, and agree - poignantly true. I also like how you say in the previous post: "i believe in God. because despite my lack of knowledge or faith (moreover, despite what knowledge i may have to the contrary), i cannot deny it." You capture well that Truth is there to be sought and known, even in the middle of circumstances that tell us clearly and directly otherwise, which in my experience, at least, happens SO often. And the only thing I'm not on board with is where religion starts - I think it starts with something outside of man, which is why it can be looked for and found. Not inside of man, because that would be objective and arbitrary and never the same. I think if there is Truth, it must be one and consistent, and outside, preceding us. And, yeah. Like you say. It's findable, if we're really looking. As long, I think, as we don't put restrictions on what "we'll let" it be (i.e. I'll believe in God, as long as He's not the one in the Bible, etc...). Yes. Then it's findable. And so the disillusionment is able to be an actually good thing, and "uncertainty" is a safer place to be than it would otherwise seem. Nice.
I'm with Becca - truth exists eternally, outside of and earlier than us.
I'm not sure it's totally "find-able" on this Earth, however. It's almost as if this life is exclusively for the seeking (and for the living of our meager conception) of that truth, that light, that sublimity.
If Grace=Truth, we only can find tiny pieces of it here; Jenna and I talked once about heaven, and I believe that heaven is that place/space of ultimate grace and understanding.
maybe...I wish I could sound more confident and clear about all of this.
truth is outside of man , no doubt. religion - as i see it - is man's attempt to find and understand that truth which he sees all around himself. that's what i mean by 'EACH has begun in the heart of man'.
i still think it starts outside of man...i think it is God who puts in our hearts the desire to find that truth, which ultimately is Himself. that's why it's Grace, because we have no part in its beginning.
i think deep down, our instinct is to run from a God who is perfect and omnipotent, because we know that we are not. any desire to actually seek Him, or the Truth that reminds us of our own imperfection, comes from God's Grace alone.
we are pursued before we are pursuers--because on our own, we can't manufacture enough desire, interest or courage to actually run towards the thing that could rightfully destroy us.
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